Harassment has become a part of everyday life, but no one talks about it openly. Creepy comments, unwanted touching, pressure for favors, or abusive messages and threats online all of this happens regularly. Yet most cases never get reported. Not to the police, not to family, and sometimes not even to closest friends.
I have seen this in my own university life and heard countless stories from people around me. This silence is not because nothing is happening. The real issue is that speaking up feels too risky.
In Pakistan, this problem becomes even more complicated because of family honor, society’s judgment, and the common mindset of “just adjust and stay quiet.”
Harassment at University: When Marks Become a Weapon
University should be a place where you can learn freely and feel safe. But for many girls (and sometimes boys), it turns into a stressful and fearful environment. Professors or senior students often misuse their power through marks, recommendations, or projects.
One of my friends told me how a teacher started calling her after class for “extra help.” At first it seemed normal, but slowly the conversations became personal and uncomfortable. She stopped going, but her grades started dropping. She never reported it. She was scared that she might fail or that everyone would call her a “drama queen.”
The power difference is a big problem. If you complain, what will happen in the final exam? What will classmates think? Students from conservative families and international students feel even more pressure. Boys also stay silent because society questions their masculinity.
Harassment also happens in group projects, internships, or through leaked chats. Most students don’t report it because:
– They don’t trust the university to take any real action.
– They blame themselves
– The complaint process is too long and exhausting
– Many simply accept it as “normal here”
We need simple and safe reporting systems. Anonymous feedback that is actually checked, or a neutral mentor outside the department. It would also help to discuss power dynamics and boundaries seriously during orientation week.
Domestic Harassment: The Pain Behind Closed Doors
At home, the situation is even harder. Physical beating, daily taunts, controlling money, or forcing decisions in marriage all of this continues. Women often stay silent because of “what will people say?” If a complaint is made or a divorce happens, it can destroy the girl’s future and affect her siblings’ marriage prospects too.
One of my relatives stayed in a toxic marriage for years, hoping things would improve for the sake of her children. Many victims feel it is their own fault. Men also face abuse but don’t speak up because society makes fun of them.
The police often dismiss these cases as “family matters.” That’s why everything stays hidden. We need community support systems where people can get help without having to go public immediately. Teaching respect and healthy relationships from the school level is very important.
Online Harassment: The Shadow That Follows You
Social media has made harassment much easier. Reject someone, post something, or have a small argument and suddenly you face abuse, morphed photos, and doxxing. If you block one account, a new one appears the next day.
This becomes worse when it is linked to university rivalries or revenge after breakups. The mental pressure is so high that it affects studies. Girls and minority students are targeted more. Still, most people don’t report it. They think “it’s just online, not real life.” But when your reputation and peace are destroyed, it becomes very real.
Why the Silence Continues
Whether at university, home, or online, the reasons are almost the same:
– Fear that things will get worse
– Shame and self-blame
– Lack of trust in authorities
– Pressure to protect family reputation
This silence doesn’t only hurt the victim it harms the whole system and gives harassers more courage.
What Can Actually Help?
We don’t need a perfect system, just practical steps. Universities should create easy and safe reporting channels with strong protection against retaliation. Schools must genuinely teach consent and respect. Digital safety awareness is also essential for online issues.
The biggest change needed is in our mindset. Reporting harassment should not be seen as “creating drama” but as standing up for your dignity. Change can start with small actions listening to friends without judging them, stopping bad jokes, and supporting those who speak up.
Conclusion
Harassment remains hidden because speaking up comes at a very high cost your reputation, future, and peace of mind. But if we all stay silent, this problem will never end. As students, we can begin this change by becoming more aware, offering support, and openly discussing these issues. As long as we consider this “normal,” real safety will remain just a dream.
Harassment isn’t limited to universities or colleges; it can happen anywhere, including at home. Sometimes, victims can’t speak up, especially if it’s happening within their family, due to fear of aggressive reactions or being forced to leave their home. In countries like Pakistan, where honour killings are a reality, victims may face additional challenges if they report harassment.
Often, the victim is blamed first, and discussions about the perpetrator’s actions are secondary. Law enforcement can be slow to act, allowing perpetrators to go unpunished.
One potential solution could be for universities to have same-gender teachers for students female teachers for girls and male teachers for boys. This might help reduce harassment cases.
